5 Weeks Old

And my "little" guy is 12 pounds, as measured in the buff at the hospital yesterday. I love the fact they have a free infant scale there.

I'm 5 weeks old! 

Here Aaron  is at 5 weeks old, wearing Team Monster!

Here is his sister, wearing that same onsie when she was exactly one month old.

Emma is Three!

Sometime in the middle of our big trip to see family, Emma turned 3 years old. I can't believe the last 3 years went by so fast!

This year she has been obsessed with Toy Story, so for her birthday she had a Toy Story themed "party." I say party in quotes because we were supposed to be at Grandma and Grandpa Lewis's house, but we got stuck in the blizzard in Nebraska and stayed 2 nights in York, Nebraska at a hotel. Luckily we had the party supplies with us,  and the manager of the hotel let us have a mini-party there. 

Daddy went to the Wal-Mart, which was open, and got a Christmas cupcake cake for her birthday since the Toy Story cake was in Chicago. :) She still had fun -- there was a little girl at the hotel who was the granddaughter of the manager, and she and Emma played. She even got a gift for Emma! It was a really fun day, even if we were stuck in the snow.

How my big girl has grown.... our hands at 3 years and 3 days old. From the picture below, at about 3 weeks of age. 

It's going to be a pretty amazing Christmas. I think we're so lucky to have the two kids we have, and I'm so grateful to be celebrating the holiday with them. 

One Month Old

Not sure where the time went, but my big boy is one month old today. He was amazing on the trip to Kansas, and didn't even seem to notice the giant blizzard.

Here he is, taking a nap on Daddy's chest. 

I'm one month old! I don't know how much he weighs, but I would guess it's close to 11 pounds or more. He doesn't fit in his newborn clothes anymore, and we've already gone up a size on the prefold diapers. 

My Sleepy Boy

And one more video.... he was very sleepy in Daddy's arms.

Emma Sings to Aaron

She's such a good big sister. Poor little guy -- he had some bad gas and struggles getting poo out today, and every time she sang to him, he settled down. It was amazing! I guess he's heard her voice enough in the womb that it's comforting to him. We got a little bit on video.

14 Days Old

Today my "little" guy is 14 days old! He's had a bit of a rough day, cluster feeding (growth spurt!) but is settled down for the night.

He also got his first mail today!

I forgot to mention that his umbilical stump finally fell out today, while I was out running some errands. I don't remember when Emma's fell out but it doesn't feel like it took this long! Glad it did though -- it was getting a bit stinky. :) 

Doctor Visits

Aaron's 13 day Check-Up:

At birth, his weight was 8lb, 5oz.

At d/c from the hospital, his weight was 7lb, 14oz.

At his last appointment (5 days old), he was back to 8lb, 5oz.

Today, at 13 days, he was 9lb, 5oz!! Way to go baby boy! They said he was 22 inches, but there's no way he grew 2 inches in 13 days. :) Breastfeeding rocks.

His umbilical stump is still there, doc said it should fall off in the next few days. He's trying to hold his head up, even though he really shouldn't be yet.

Emma's 3 Year Check-Up

Big girl weighed in at 29 lbs (35%ile) and 37.5 inches (75%ile). I mentioned her random snoring, and the doc checked her tonsils, which were a little red and swollen. They did a swab, and it turns out she has strep! So she's on antibiotics for a little while.

All in all, it was a really good visit with the pediatrician. Aaron goes back at 2 months, Emma goes back at 4 years.

On a side note, I'll be donating to the Mother's Milk Bank of Central Ohio, and I'm really excited about that. I should easily be able to get over the 200 oz that they request. Since I haven't donated blood for a long, long time (and that's one thing I always enjoyed being able to do), I think this is an exciting next step for me.

Five Years Ago

I was waiting to miscarry my first child.

I can't believe it's been 5 years. My heart still breaks when I think about our first little one. At 8w1d we had an on-time baby with a strong heartbeat. 10 days later, we went to the ER and found our little one was gone. 3 days after that, I had a D&C.

Have I healed? Maybe some. I don't cry every day, but I do think about that first baby every day. Those were the only ultrasound photos of a loss I had kept, and it was the loss that shattered my innocence. Little did I know that my heart would keep breaking over and over and over again.

It's been 6 years since we started trying to have a baby.

5 years since our first loss.

3 years since Emma was born.

Almost 1 year since our last chemical pregnancy loss.

And 12 days since Aaron entered our lives outside my womb.

I'm glad the roller coaster is over. As I listen to my new son squirm around, grunt and cry, watch him taking in the world around him, and enjoy the sight of his big sister cuddling with him in the morning, I know the pain was worth it. But boy, was it hard. So very, very hard.

I miss all 9 of my babies, no matter how long or short those pregnancies were. Each and every one of them were desperately wanted and loved. I wish I knew what they would have been like, had they grown up. I wish I could have named them. I hope they knew how much they were loved, even in their short presence here on earth.

No matter how much time goes by, and how busy I get with my two amazing kids, I will never forget. Ever.

11 Days Old

And we're settling into a nice routine. I don't know how I got so lucky, but Aaron is a fairly "easy" baby when it comes to reading his cues. Either I am experienced now, or his temperament is different, or a combination of the two. But he's really adjusting well to the outside world and Emma is adjusting to him.

Here he is at 8 days old... not very happy about his picture being taken. I plan on taking a picture with him and the bear for a while -- I wanted to do something similar with Emma, but just totally forgot with all the sleep deprivation. I have to say, I'm sleeping better now that he's out than when he was in. I had such bad sciatica that I never slept more than an hour and a half, even with the Ambien that the OB prescribed. With him, there are nights I actually get 3 hours of sleep in a row.

We got our tree this past weekend, and Emma was very excited (although it was "too cold" when we were picking it out and she didn't want to stay). She helped decorate the tree. It's an odd mish-mash of decorations but that's ok. It's like the trees of my youth. 

And here's our first family picture. It's the best of the bunch, which isn't saying much. I look a little bloated, LOL!  I have lost 20 pounds from my highest weight pregnant, and have another 30 to go before I'll feel comfortable. I'd actually like to lose 40 more, that would be 20 below my pre-pregnancy weight and more down to where my body feels ok. But we'll see -- breastfeeding will help. 

We're excited to see family soon! Hopefully we'll have lots of pictures to share from Kansas and Illinois. 

In One Week...

The world has changed a lot! I feel pretty good, but have been over-doing it every day. I really need to remind myself that just a week ago, I was actively trying to push Aaron out into the world!

*On Tuesday (the day after we got home), we all went out for a couple of hours shopping.

*On Wednesday, we went to the grocery store. We shopped while Emma played in the little play area that the store has (and it's supervised, which is awesome).

*On Thursday, we dropped Emma off at daycare (she goes one day a week) and then went to the pediatrician for Aaron's first appointment. Then we ran out to Bed Bath and Beyond and got some new picture frames for our new family pictures (when we get them taken). I also did 3 loads of laundry.

*On Friday, we went to the park for an hour and then later on, went out and got our Christmas tree.

*Today, we went and ran some errands at Sam's and WalMart (we got the Toys for Tots toys that we get every year), and I raked and bagged the rest of the leaves in the back yard.

Yes, I think I might be over-doing it.